Do you really want to be successful?

Photo by Frederik Löwer on Unsplash

Many people fail in life because they believe in the adage: If you don’t succeed, try something else. But success eludes those who follow such advice.

The dreams that have come true did so because people stuck to their ambitions. — John C. Maxwell

A lust for life.

Hitting my thirties was not a celebratory moment for me. I woke up, looked around and realised I was in the same place I had always been as far as my success was concerned. I had achieved a few things like starting a family and having a decent roof over my head. Things that I am deeply thankful and grateful for. Yet I felt like the life I saw myself living was still out of reach.

I once had a grand vision of being a successful football player. I would practice every day, emulating the greats. A friend from school saw me play and invited me to try out for his team. They loved me. I was good.

I made it to every training session which was a 10 minute walk from my house. For some reason I was always late or never turned up at all to any of the games. One day my friend told me that training was postponed for a while and that he would let me know when it starts up again. he never did.

I couldn’t bring myself to walk the 10 minutes and turn up as I knew the reason why I wasn’t invited anymore.

My next love became music. I had always been a fan of Michael Jackson. Watching his live performances and seeing people loosing their minds, passing out and crying! That was the influence I wanted to have on people. That was how I wanted to make people feel. I spent weeks and months practising, learning how to write song, how to sing. I continued this pursuit for a long time, up into my late 20’s but real life eventually drilled it out of me.

I had to work and provide for myself and my family. I didn’t have time to indulge in a dream that was baring no fruit anymore. Reality was too brutal.

At 30 I sat and wondered where I had gone wrong? Why some people who were not as talented as me managed to become so successful?

Then it hit me. Did I really want to be successful or did I just like the idea of it.

Do you really want this?

I’m sure that at least half of the population of the world have had the dream of being a sports person or musician. But grew out of these dreams pretty quickly.

My ambitions of having a music carrier lasted till I was in my mid 20’s so I did take it beyond the realm of fantasy. I thought it was my future career. Then I began to write less and recorded less until the point where now it’s a hobby that I sometimes pick up when I have nothing better to do. What lead to this? What made me give up on this dream?

We all want to be successful is one way or another, but do we really want it?

Imagine: if I guaranteed to give you £1 million in a year’s time if you consistently worked 10 hours a day, Monday to Sunday, would you do it? You most likely would, because the guarantee of a reward is there. Dreams don’t guarantee success and the longer it takes to reach that ideal the quicker the excitement and energy begins to die.

What makes successful people different is that they believe in their dreams. They are willing to do whatever it takes to make them a reality. Regardless of how long it takes, how hard it is and what sacrifices they have to make to achieve them.

The sacrifices we make.

Are you willing to not hang out with friend and instead spend the hours going to networking events and attending seminars? Are you willing to not watch Netflix and instead educate yourself on the industry you are trying to get into? Are you willing to not spend your money on a new pair of shoes and instead buy a course, invest the money in your business?

So many of us wouldn’t because the outcome is not guaranteed.

Some are window-openers. When making decisions about what to do with their time, they want to be able to look through a window. If they can see the outcome they want through the glass, they open the window and step through.

The problem is that for most good things in life, the pass to success isn’t so clear. There isn’t an open window with the ideal outcome clearly visible on the other side. — Ali Abdaal

Photo by Sebastian Staines on Unsplash

Every day you make sacrifices with your time. While choosing to do one thing, you sacrifice the time you could have been using to do another thing.

Most of the time we end up sacrificing the time we could spend being productive for things that may bring us some form of instant gratification but in the long run do nothing for us but waste our time. Now that’s not to say that these things don’t have a place in our lives. We all need some downtime once in a while.

When you ask yourself why things are not going the way you want them to in your life, when you have not achieved what you want in life, you must ask yourself: ‘Have I really given this the time it deserves?’

Have you been dedicated? Have you been relentless in your pursuit? Have you been disciplined? If you haven’t the next obvious question is…

Do you really want this?

This is a courtship with the universe.

Repeat after me — I want to be successful. I am willing to do whatever it takes to achieve the success I want. I will not rest until I am achieving my dreams.

Success is not a destination. It’s a path that begins rocky but smooths itself out along the way as long as you continue to travel along it. It’s not going to be easy, it never will be. When you see people who have succeeded it looks easy because they have reached the smooth part of the path while you’re still on rocky ground. No one shares the hard times on their Instagram feed so stop looking at where they are. If you want to know about their success get in touch and ask.

The universe has every possible joy and success waiting for you behind this one question: How much do you want it? Once you have answered that, the universe will wait for you to prove it.

The ones who only lust for the reward will soon give up. The ones who believe that they deserve it will go through every painful step to get to that place.

I have chosen to be successful and to give the time and energy to do so and I am willing to wait for as long as it takes. Then I will enjoy the fruits of my labour.

Conclusion

I hope this helps you if you need it. I’ve been in a bit of a dark place lately. With everything going on in the world and having this feeling of not doing enough not achieving the results I expect has been weighing over my head.

I had to ask myself if this was something I really wanted or if I was another person lusting the life I see on Instagram. I guess only time will tell.

Keep Going.

Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts — Winston S. Churchill

I wish everyone would stop telling us to work hard and tell us how!

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